


Warmth

by HeichousHeadphone



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Autistic Tendou Satori, M/M, Miscarriage, Pregnancy, Surgery, TenSemi - Freeform, Trans Character, Trans Pregnancy, Trans Semi Eita, tendou x semi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2020-01-07 14:27:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18412505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeichousHeadphone/pseuds/HeichousHeadphone
Summary: Satori and Eita spend a quiet night at the hospital with their baby.





	Warmth

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys' I wrote this in two hours and figured I'd post it! Special thanks to my good friend Martin who made me inspired to write this, and id like to thank my beta readers!!  
> Find me on tumblr at Heichousheadphones, where I draw art for all your Haikyuu needs!
> 
> Semi is a trans male in this fic, and Tendou is autistic, but that doesn't play a huge role, it's simply a personal headcanon i decided to throw in. 
> 
> Trigger warnings for miscarriage
> 
> Enjoy! and thanks for reading!

Doctors.

  
Satori _hated_ doctors.

  
Ever since he was a kid, all they did was poke and prod, probe and question. They never told you what was good about your health, or what you were doing right. Only things like “I’m sorry, he was born like this.”, or “Have you considered taking him to a church? Perhaps he’s been possessed.”, So Satori never really liked them.

  
Bringing his husband in to a doctor was no different.

  
They’d rushed to the hospital as soon as Eita felt uncomfortable and noticed an excess amount of blood in his boxers, as well as crippling stomach cramps. Seeing as he was carrying precious cargo, Satori had thrown his shoes on and helped him out to their truck to speed to the hospital, not caring for anything but the tiny life that they’d created together.

  
After the initial tests and needles, as well as several bouts of questioning as Eita groaned in pain and tears streamed down his face with fear, Satori held his hand in an attempt to calm him down as they waited for news. They’d been there for almost five hours, well into the next day, but Satori was too worried to care about how tired he was.

  
Minutes passed, the only sounds in the room were the constant ticking of the clock and Eita’s soft grunts and whines of pain, hands smoothing over his slight bump. Satori held his hand the entire, time, reassuring his husband that it would be okay, but he was afraid that by saying that he’d be telling a lie. There was a soft clicking as the door opened, and both men whipped to look at the doctor who had just walked in.

  
“What’s wrong with her?” Eita asked breathlessly as he tried to sit up a bit, Satori pushing him back so he could be more comfortable. Grunting as he got pushed gently, Eita whimpered out a “Can we help her?”

  
The doctor sighed and nodded, watching the worried couple carefully. “She’s having problems with her heart. We can do a surgery on her, but it’s… very risky. She may end up with physical deformities if we disrupt her developmental environment too much, and it can be very stressful on the carrier,” She explained, handing them a few papers. “Here are the surgery consent forms if you wish to go through with it, if not, we can make arrangements to… take care of her.”

  
Satori’s eyes widened and he took the papers, turning to Eita with a concerned frown, who had been silent throughout the whole ordeal. He had a hand cupped over his face and tears were threatening to fall again as he rubbed his tummy softly. Satori reached forward to put a hand on top of his husband’s, looking at him. Eita let out a shaky breath and sniffled, looking to the doctor sadly, but he still had a sliver of hope in his eyes. “What are the success rates?” he asked hesitantly.

  
The doctor swallowed thickly, affected by the powerful emotions of the two men. “There’s a 23% chance of success.”

  
Eita’s hopeful look vanished quickly, looking down at the papers with realization that this was their baby, and even if they agreed to the operation, only 23%...

  
Satori took Eita’s hand as he stared down at the papers blankly, rubbing his thumbs over his husband’s knuckles soothingly, hoping it would help him, even a little. Biting his lip, he asked; “What do you want to do, Eita?”

  
Eita blinked around his tears, unable to stop them from sliding down his cheeks, not bothering to wipe them away. Lip trembling, he sniffled softly once more. “Maybe we should let her go…” he breathed, words penetrating loudly through the deafening silence.

  
Satori’s heart dropped and he got up to sit next to Eita, putting his hands on his stomach gently, looking him in the eye with desperation. “Eita… Are you sure?”  
“Yes.” He mumbled.

  
“Eita… This is our baby girl. Our sweet girl, she has a whole life ahead of her, you don’t want to give her the chance?” He asked, going to hold his hands. “You’d get to hold her in your arms, comfort her when she’s sad… We might not ever get this chance again, Eita.” He reasoned, tilting his head up to look at him sincerely. “It’s your choice, but… Think about what you’re choosing.”

  
The two sat in silence together, the doctor long gone, figuring they’d want to have the conversation alone. Satori rubbed his hands over Eita’s stomach as his husband read through the forms, breaths shaky. After several long minutes, maybe an hour, or perhaps a small eternity, Eita set down the sheets with a rustle. “Hand me a pen.”

  
Satori shot up and gawked at him, shocked. “Really?” he asked, and Eita looked up at him with a sad smile.

  
“Yeah, like you said… she’s our baby girl. I don’t care if she has a funny arm, or if she can’t talk very well, or anything like that. She’s my baby girl… our baby girl.” He smiled down at his stomach and wiped his eyes again, Satori finally holding a pen in front of him and a packet of tissues. “I’m willing to risk it, are you?” He asked, turning to the redhead.

  
Satori smiled gently, taking his hand. “Yeah, I am.”

  
They signed the paper together, pinkies linked lovingly, hopefully, in the cold silence of the hospital room.

  
Only mere moments after they’d handed in the consent forms, Eita had been prepped for surgery and was taken away. Satori sat outside of the waiting room, hunched over and unable to get up in fear that he’d be sick to his stomach from worry. Two hours into waiting, a nurse had walked over and set down a cup of coffee beside him, but he couldn’t bring himself to drink it. Visiting hours had long ended, ans Satori was getting even more antsy with all the quiet.

  
More time ticked by, and things seemed too quiet in the corridors to seem normal. Satori had just brought his knees up to his chest and had been tugging lightly at his hair as a sort of calming method, wishing he had his blanket for comfort, when a surgeon walked out, mask on, but gloves nowhere to be seen. Specks of blood were adorning his scrubs and he had an expressionless face. Motioning for him to stand up, he patted his back and squeezed lightly, resting his hand there. Satori tasted bile in his throat. “I’m sorry,” The surgeon muttered, a small break in his voice.

  
Tears rolled down his cheeks without hesitation, and one hand came up to muffle his heart-wrenching cry, the other pressing to the door of the operating room. There was no way. He was lying. _Eita… Was he alright?_ “Can-“ He swallowed around the lump in his throat, “Can I g-go see Eita?”

  
The doctor nodded and led him inside the operating room. It smelled like alcohol. Eita was laying on the bed, expression hollow and depressed. He didn’t seem to be entirely there. Turning his head to look at Satori, he held a hand out weakly, eyes rimmed with red. “Satori,” He murmured, hands shaking. Satori dropped down to his level, pressing his lips to the back of Eita’s hand lightly, tears falling down his face.

  
“Don’t cry, Eita, please,” He pleaded, cupping his cheek and hushing his husband’s sobs. “It’ll be okay… We can try again, yeah?” he tried to smile but couldn’t. watching Eita break before his eyes was too much to handle.

  
Satori flinched at a nudge to his shoulder, turning to see the surgeon holding a small bundled up towel. Realizing what it was, he hauled himself up to see the baby hidden under the soft blanket. More silent tears fell down his face as he took the lifeless child into his arms, moving the blanket to peer at her hair. Small curls with muted color were spread across her head, and Satori wiped away a tear that had fallen onto her cheek. She was still warm, if he tried hard enough, he could convince himself everything was okay.

  
But it wasn’t.

  
He turned to Eita, who had been staring at him with a mix of curiosity, sadness, and longing. Lowering himself down once more and cradling the tiny body to his chest, he gestured to the bundle. “Do you- “

  
“I want to hold her,” Eita pleaded, holding out his arms. Satori handed him the baby gently, careful of his husband’s weak arms. Eita peered down at the baby girl and his face crumbled, a grief-stricken smile finding its way onto his face as he traced a finger down her soft cheek. “She… she has your nose…” He noted, running his thumb gently down the bridge and sniffling. Satori moved closer to wrap his arms around Eita gently and watched the baby as well. Satori wondered if he could feel the faint heat of her tiny body, or if he noticed how heavy she was in his arms.

  
“And your hair…” Satori whispered quietly, the two of them sitting together in their own little world, wishing they could be with a baby who was smiling and laughing, not limp and slowly turning cold. Turning to face his husband again, he watched his features carefully as he saw the sadness and longing as they held their departed baby, together in the stifling hospital room at 4 a.m. in the morning. “Eita…”

  
“Yeah...?” His husband spoke quietly, but Satori could hear it.

  
“Maybe… Someday, we could… try again?” He asked gently, running his thumb over Eita’s knuckles as his husband finally handed their child off.

  
Eita smiled tiredly at the comforting gesture, the first true smile of the night, and Satori leaned in to kiss him. Leaning on his shoulder, Satori heard a soft, “Yeah. Someday.”

  
Satori could smell the alcohol in the air, could taste the tears that he’d kissed off his husband’s cheeks, could feel the pain in his chest from how much his heart hurt, could see the bundle in the surgeon’s arms, but most of all, he could see Eita. And somehow, he knew it’d be alright.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments/Kudos are appreciated!! Thanks for reading, find me at @HeichousHeadphones on Tumblr!


End file.
